Post Surgery And Beyond

by Winding Pathways | May 22, 2025 | Ruminations

Post Three – Three to Eight Weeks and Beyond
(Think Buzz Lightyear – All is Possible)

Mummy was Right!

Here I am!  Starting to feel better. Thinking I can do things. And I can. However, as friends near and far remind me, “Take things easily.”

As kids, when we’d get up in the morning feeling kind of crummy, Mum always said, “Wash up, get dressed, have breakfast, make your bed. Then, we will decide if you need to stay home.”  Most of the time we were good to go.

I found the same with this period of post-surgery. This link has fabulous insights on post surgery care.

Below is a rhythm I found helpful.

Usually, some movement, healthy food, and getting dressed did the trick.  My body is stiff, I feel sweaty from hours in bed, I’m hungry and sometimes ‘hangry’. I started off doing the “baby” leg exercises important following back surgery. Then, I’d get the other tasks done. Doing these few routine tasks settled me in. Adding any needed OTC medication helped.  Then, rest. Yep. Back to lying down but not in bed. That is too easy.  And, I want bed to be for sleep not slumming.  So, I kept items near the couch and would lie down for about 20 minutes.  Alternating ice and heat on various complaining body parts helped. Then, up to do a few simple activities.

After a time, I incorporated light house work like dishes, tidying up spaces, computer work to keep in touch and pay bills, walking the driveway horseshoe loop for exercise. Always mindful to avoid bending, twisting, over-reaching. The vertebrae and hardware need to fuse.

Remember to send TY notes to folks. I would do a few each day.  I kept a list and postcards pre-addressed and stamped to send. And, found the Jacquie Lawson ecards helpful to send to people who unexpectedly helped.

Connect with people a few times a week to lessen feelings of isolation. I’d ask people close by to help arrange visits.  From a distance, I simply sent periodic, and sometimes idiotic, emails to people.  Usually, I got idiotic replies back that made me smile and laugh.

Here is one from another childhood friend: “Thanks for the update–keep ’em coming. I was going to ask how things were going and I’m glad you seem to be hanging in. HMMM perhaps coming up with strategies to complete every day activities will be good for your brain! When my yoga teacher introduces a new pose that sounds really wonky, I call it “Yoga for Alzheimers prevention.””

Moving

Walk on safe surfaces several times a day. On warm days, I could walk the horseshoe drive a few times each day.  Then, I’d increase the distances. Some days, I simply did less.  The upward trajectory of movement and health is the goal. Physical therapy may not start for several more weeks. I did the simple but important leg exercises as per the medical booklet.

My walking mantra is:  Heel-toe. Low belly up. Shoulders back. Chin parallel to the walking surface. Use your peripheral vision. Cane as a guide and as per an Occupational Therapy friend, Increase your Stride.

The six-week checkup was positive, and the reminder to limit bending/twisting was good. Lifting about 15 pounds is OK. One and a half gallons of milk is about 15 pounds. I still do morning preparation and chores, then rest. After about 6.5 weeks, I successfully put on compression socks by myself. So, Rich’s morning task is about done.

The cane for going out and about is helpful. Around the house, I manage all right. And, reachers!  Keep them!  So, I bought several.

None Of Us Is As Smart As All Of Us

Years ago, when trying to figure out something, a Kansas colleague, Lila King, stated, “None of us is as smart as all of us.” By golly, we figured out a sticky problem.  That mantra has proved helpful many times since. How do I get things done? Ask! People want to help.

Continuing to have and accept help is important in these weeks and beyond.  I found that I tired easily, so I rested.  The prioritized list of “things to do that are helpful” made it easy for friends and family to visit and pitch in, which they all did graciously.  And my saying, “Yes, thank you!” helped all around. What are some of these tasks?

Having family come help healed more than just the tasks.  Great company and was reassuring.

Friends and family measured the space for new shower curtains, researched the best sites to order from, and helped install.  Hotel-quality and style make freshening shower curtains easier without awkwardly removing the rod.

The family helped wash the insides of windows where the painter had inadvertently left smudges and install screens for the season.

Our daughter pulled the paint cans from storage so the painter could finish one small project. Our son and son-in-law hung pictures and screens, split wood, and were attentive od my getting into and out of the car.  They all did many small deeds of kindness. Rich was close by and helpful over the many weeks.

After six weeks, the toenails were long, so our daughter suggested a pedicure so that a professional could trim them. How lovely to have someone nurture the feet. I didn’t think about that as an option.  None of us is as smart as all of us.

An East Coast friend mentioned ways to care for the surgical scars to loosen up tissue and avoid binding problems in the future. None of us is as smart as all of us.

When I mentioned that the doctor visit showed high blood pressure, a friend said, “Wait five minutes and do again.” Yes, of course.  When we first come to a visit we have been walking, are nervous and breathing shallowly.  Deep breaths and resting a few minutes reveals normal blood pressure. Why didn’t the nurse do this? Hmmmm. None of us is as smart as all of us.

Soup Cubes to the rescue!  Again, from our daughter, I learned about these handy ways to freeze food, pop out the back, place in labeled freezer zip-locks, label, and pull out when we needed a quick meal. This is helpful now that the MealTrain is done. None of us is as smart as all of us.

So many more acts of kindness, generously shared.

Time for Pleasure

Not everything was work. A puzzle kept us entertained and our daughter is so strategic on putting it together.  While I rested, family took walks on the many trails that now link the area. They met with long-time friends and met new people. Coffee shops rock and are new to them, so Cedar Rapids has changed positively in that regard. Nice meals out. Chats in the living room and on the back deck in nice weather.

Giving Back

What Can We Do When We Feel We Can Do So Little? Healing completely takes time. Many people have helped over the weeks. And continue to do so.  At first I thought I could not do much to help. What could I do with such limitations? Well, it turns out to be quite a bit.

I asked our daughter if she would share her music. She brought her accordion along and played songs for a friend who had recently been injured. We sang – sort of – and laughed. A hospice nurse colleague asked me to work with a patient and family with healing energy.  An honor, indeed.  A labyrinth colleague and friend accidentally double-scheduled a time. She asked if I could do the one-hour Veriditas Friday ZOOM hand-held finger labyrinth walk.  Veriditas has offered this activity EVERY Friday since the Pandemic began in the US in earnest in March 2020. My theme was easy: “What Can We Do When We Feel We Can Do So Little?” Four continents were represented as over 50 people worldwide zoomed in and shared their perspectives. Another honor to give back. And, so it goes as we receive so we share – The Ketchuan philosophy. From you I receive to you I give. Together we share and from this we live. A Unitarian Universalist hymn. Inclusivity.

Well, moving on here. As I wrote in the beginning, take whatever is useful and leave the rest behind. These were simply my observations of recovery which will take about a year to be fully realized.

Post -Surgery Go Slow Now to Go Fast Later

by Marion Patterson | May 8, 2025 | Ruminations

Post Two Post-surgery time – Days 1 to 21

Go Slow Now to Go Fast Later

Go to this link for valuable information.

Being on high-level pain medications is interesting.  In the hospital recovery, I remember drowsily being aware of voices coming and going. On the post-op floor staff were excellent.  Attentive. Not too chatty. But I was chatty. They knocked when entering.  Staff identified themselves.  Two visitors did not.  So, I simply asked who they were. It’s a good habit for everyone who enters to initiate: “Hello, I am ____. I am here to___.”   Rich stayed close by.

Our son came in about day ten.  A nurse had pointed out that people tend to rush in to help with surgery.  When in truth, a person rests/sleeps a lot!  So, help later, when others have resumed their lives is often more helpful.  That proved to be true for us.

At first, I slept/rested a lot, and was foggy at best. Yet, I managed to periodically get up and trundle around the single-floor home of friends who had us stay. I thought I could do more than was actually wise to do.

Years ago, I was part of an international labyrinth team planning an international virtual facilitator workshop.  A wise colleague from Texas reminded us to go slow in planning now to go fast later. Great advise following surgery. And, other situations, too.

Just be patient. Even though I am in fairly good physical shape, I found that as I weaned off medications, body parts that I had forgotten about complained.  This is because I was holding my body more tensely and moving irregularly.  The HeartMath techniques I have learned and practiced helped. This thoughtful pause of breathing and appreciation helped me center.

Several times a day take “One Good Minute” to breathe deeply. Name and feel what you appreciate. As is appropriate check with your doctor and arrange for a licensed lymph drainage specialist to drain off excess fluids. I learned and practiced lymph drainage which helped in between sessions.

Moving Around:
Face What is Ahead of You

I am always surprised at how often I face one way and start to overreach or twist to get something not directly in front of me. As Doctor Schopick, the neurosurgeon, pointed out, “Face What You Are Doing!“ and “What is Ahead of You.” This is good practice, both literally and figuratively. Denial usually creates more problems than facing something straight on.

In this case, Nose follows Toes.  Walk heel-toe. Shoulders back. Chin up. Draw the low belly up. Use a walker or cane as a guide.  Use your peripheral vision to see. Remember, these are “code talk” for “Stop shuffling!” “Stop slouching!” “Suck in your gut!” “Release the death grip on the walker/cane!”

Use the stairs’ railing as a guide instead of pulling up or pushing down. I found a comfortable way to descend stairs first thing in the morning when I was stiff was to step down sideways, gripping like the Ninja Warriors on TV: one hand over/one hand under.

Other Thoughts

Elevate swollen areas. Long ago, injuries on my left leg created issues with swelling on the ankle and foot. I iced as appropriate and later alternated with heat. Lymph drainage by professionals relieved swelling in areas beyond the surgical sites. I checked with professionals first.

Helpers: Keep the house tidy. This promotes safety and helps the recovering person mentally. I found it helpful to make lists of what I would like done and ask helpers to do a few at a time.

Rest: do one task and lie down. I learned to recognize when I was tired.  i.e., Sigh, short-tempered. Achy. Slouching. I would lie down, even when I was sick of lying down.

Reachers: I placed in several locations around the house. Again, a learning process. when an object fell, I breathed and got the Reacher.

Clothing: As my body adjusted to post-surgery recovery, I found that I alternated between being cold and then warm. Easy to take off and put on tops and layers like vests helped. High-waisted, wide-legged pants proved easy to use. The low front and back incisions were exactly where the underpants’ bands rested.  Owie!  So, a friend suggested, “Go Commando.”  Lightweight mini-pads kept my pants clean for the several days I needed them.

Meals: People are willing to help. We arranged the Meal Train for every few days.  (Other programs exist). People brought more food than one meal. Also, this became a time for short visits. Spread out meal offers longer than you think you might want them as this is also a social time. At about two weeks, I felt like and could make meals but felt isolated, so visits were nice.

Visitors: We all have different social personalities. Even social, spontaneous folks may prefer a more structured, pre-planned visit time. (phone or in person.) I found it helpful to ask folks to email vs text to see when I might want to visit or talk on the phone. Unless you put the phone on mute, texts disrupt your rest.

Be Specific: Tell people specifically what you do appreciate and do not want or need.  i.e., no war stories.  Keep visits to 30-45 minutes. If you do not want/need flowers/plants, tell people. Suggest other ways for them to connect.  i.e., meals, cards over time beyond the initial phase, taking you on short drives, arranging phone calls, and short visits, help keeping the house tidy. Spontaneous drop-ins can be problematic. You may be tired, have just laid down, having a harder day. Getting to the door takes time. Visiting takes enormous energy. We have amazing friends who helped with household cleaning tasks. Bathrooms and vacuuming were two enormous helps.

Areas the medical community could help with: Show and have clients practice how to use a walker and cane. I didn’t know for weeks to use the cane on the opposite side of the injured body. Call three days post-surgery and ask, “What are you experiencing?” Advise on scar rehabilitation after it has healed to loosen skin from fascia and other muscles. This promotes flexibility in the future.

Notes, texts, or emails to check in over several weeks to spread out and help you feel connected to the world. I took time to send e-cards or emails to thank them and stay in touch with updates.

Transportation:  Allow people to drive you around for a number of weeks. Learn how to get in and out of cars.  A great tip on YouTube is to put heavy plastic on the seat to help you slip in and out of the car.

Keep items within reach from knees to shoulders

Keeping Clean: Body wash clothes. No bending beyond 30 degrees. If you remember geometry class, a right angle is the letter L. Half that is 45 degrees. 30 degrees is even less. Go no further! Let the bones and hardware fuse.

Small cups to spit into and rinse mouth. Baby wipes for anus. Dispose in the trash, not the toilet.  Otherwise, the wipes can clog up septic and sewer systems. THAT is a big problem.  Body wash clothes are handy and safer than soap bars.  The latter are slippery, and if one falls from your hand, it could hit your body, which hurts, or you could slip on it. Trying to pick one up with a Reacher is nigh impossible. Body washcloths are soft and easy to grasp with a Reacher.

Caregivers: Do what the person wants. Even if it seems silly or odd. A good way to ask is, “What do you want or need done now?” vs. “Well, let me know if you need anything.” Often our brain cannot function to say, take out the trash, pull frozen meals out of freezer, wash and put away dishes….

Patient: Be patient.  Helpers may do things differently than you.  If the task gets done, just say thank you.

Family, Friends, and Colleagues: Send encouragement and gentle advice.  One childhood friend shared: “I’m so glad you are recovering well.  It sure takes time, especially when you consider what you have been thru.  Just keep taking it a day at a time, and keep listening to your body like you have been.  My experience with my hips taught me to do exactly what the discharge instructions say.  I paid for it whenever I tried to do too much too quickly.”

People I work with reminded me to avoid doing things that impede my progress.  Take a “pity party, but don’t wallow in it.” And “Be a compliant patient.” So, let’s go for it and do less now to do more later.

Remember, “You Got This!”